Chemo 2 and 3 

So after doing chemo number 1 I thought I'd walk in and number 2 would be so easy, oh how I got that so wrong I sat there for 2 hours waiting to actually go in when I asked what was going on I was told my notes had been lost 😡. Slightly conserning considering my chemo gets made up that morning so my chemo hadn't even been made so I had a longer wait whilst they tried to get hold of my oncologist to find out what I was actually suppose to be having. I was then told they had a back up so I could start. 
I was a little bit annoyed but since being diagnosed I'm trying not to let the little things get to me and look at the bigger picture, I'm sure it was harder for the nurses trying to catch up and actually find the notes than it was for me waiting. So I went in and got hooked up which was very sore this time but it was done on the first attempt so I was happy.  I sat and had my lunch that the lovely volunteer brought round. Shortly afterwards my side affects started a lot quicker than my previous round my arm was really hurting where the chemo was going in and my throat started to get tingly which didn't happen last time. So I kept checking my heat pad was still on and decided that I should get my scarf to wrap around me to stop my throat from tingling.  Non of that worked so I called the nurse over who started to panic and before I could say anything else I had 3 electric heat pads covering my body to try and calm it down.  It did help but didn't make me feel very comfortable due to being so hot 🤦🏼‍♀️. By this point I had 30 minutes left my arm was so painful that I was trying not to shout out in pain I did mention it to the nurse she suggested turning the drip down so it would take longer, I just wanted to get home so said no. 
Finally it was finished the flush took 5 minutes but I had it slowed down as it was just so painful.  This time my dad was coming to pick me up I had to call to get him to bring my hot water bottle and actually come in and get me as I felt so fragile. 
As soon as we got home I knew this round was going to make me feel a lot more tired and my side affects were a lot worse than before.  I was so grateful that everyone was at home to do everything because I really couldn't cope. 
The children were very good and this time just got on with it they were happy to have grandad here to run them to school and cook them dinner. I felt absolutely awful and couldn't really do anything. 
On the Friday after my infusion it was firework night so instead of going out like we usually did this year we had fireworks at home and made a lovely dinner to go with it (I say we I didn't do any it was all dean, scott and dad🤣). It was nice to be able to watch the fireworks but it was absolutely exhausting trying to feel normal to enjoy it. I have never felt so tired ever like those last few days after chemo. Dad went home on the Saturday and I woke up thinking I felt ok I hoovered and washed up once he left and thought yes I'm turning a corner. Only to be laying in bed trying to stay awake an hour later luckily the children were happy to be watching films and just lounging around the house so I could sleep most the day I actually couldn't keep my eyes open. 
A few days later I was feeling a lot better and managed to go on Matthews school trip with him I was so happy to be able to make those memories with him and for him not to miss out on his trip. We went on a canal boat to Hertford and a museum which Matthew loved to be able to do with his friends. 
The rest of chemo went pretty well I was used to the tablets the injections were getting better and we was all trying to get used to out new routine, it was just a shame that once I started to feel a little back to normal it was time for Covid tests and bloods again ready for the next round.  
My next round I was absolutely dreading I was so worried it would be the same as last. I made Scott take a day off work and take me out for a Christmassy day so I could make the most of it before feeling awful. 
It was a lovely day we went and brought some new decorations for the tree and house and went out for lunch had a sneaky wine.
I went in for round 3 on the 24th November this time they was only an hour delayed I was told they didn't have as many nurses in they was also delayed getting my actual chemo ready so it was a bit of a wait. I was just trying to calm myself and not get too anxious about the side affects kicking in to quickly.  
My chemo arrived and I was hooked up this time I didn't even feel the cannula go in and I was on at the nurses constantly about my heat pad being on the highest setting on my arm so I didnt hurt.  
I got stuck into program on Netflix and tried to relax. Before I knew it it was time for my flush my chemo had finished and I had no side affects apart from tingling in my hand and toes. I was so relieved that it had gone well and my arm wasn't painful or feeling so tired. 
It was Michelle's turn this time to come and look after me so she picked me up from the hospital and took me home to rest and do nothing whilst she was here for a few days. 
The children were so happy they normally see grandad a lot as he visits most months but Nanny doesn't so to have her here for a few days was amazing.  
I was fully prepared to feel rubbish like last round but this round I really didn't feel that bad I was a little tired but I could cope with that. So tried my best to rest as much as I could. Michelle went home on the Saturday I was so relieved that she came it ment that Scott could carry on working so he could then take time off for my last round in December (last round I can't actually believe it it has gone so quick) 

It was finally December which ment I could get in the Christmas spirit that by now I would normally be well into but this year it's been a struggle for me I haven't felt like doing anything Christmassy really I hadn't really watched any of the cheesy films that I thought I would or made all my list or shopping.  
I felt really deflated and fed up with chemo and cancer, my back was really painful too which was worrying me. So I rang my nurse and requested a scan on my back I was booked in for a CT scan to check for any signs of cancer that I had convinced myself was obviously why my back hurts so much(nothing to do with the fact that Iv had back ache for 11 years 🙄). That's one of the bad things that come with cancer any new or different ache and pain worry's the life out of you and you automatically think it's cancer 😢 

I went for my CT scan which was actually so quick I wondered if I was at the right hospital 🤣. 
I was due for a catch up with my nurse on the 9th so I only had a week to wait for results. 
whilst we waited  I tried not to panic too much about the results.

My sister had just had surgery so we decided to spend the Saturday at her house keeping her company and making sure she didn't do too much the kids loved seeing Aunty Erin, Winnie and Rocco kept them busy whilst daddy Went to pick out  our Christmas tree. I was a bit worried leaving Scott unattended picking being as he gets the biggest tree he can find every year. It was lovely arriving home and being able to decorate Christmas tree I was worried about my hands playing up but this round of chemo has been the best one so far iv had hardly no symptoms and those iv had had been easy to cope with. It just goes to show how different each round can be being as it's the same amount of chemo going in each time. 
This time before chemo I was able to go into London with my dad we go every year at Christmas time to sing carols in a lovely church, this year we wasn't able to go to the carols but we still decided to go and see the lights and go to a certain Thai restaurant that we love going to. We had a lovely time going round the Christmas markets and having a few drinks it was a nice treat before starting my LAST round. 

I also received the best news before my last round of treatment my chemotherapy was actually working my traces on my lungs showed they were SHRINKING!!!! 
So i was booked in for an MRI to check my Bowel and pelvis this is with the hope that it has shrunk enough for surgery that I will hopefully be having in the next few months. 

I'm sat writing this the day before my last round feeling very nervous about going in tomorrow one because as Iv  learnt no chemo session is the same so I'm really hoping for a good one and no really bad side effects ready for Christmas. Two this is my last round of this chemo so I won't be on chemo for I don't know how long as I haven't been told the next plan until my MRI has been looked at. So I don't know if my tumours will start growing again (please everyone cross your fingers it doesn't) whilst I'm on my chemo break that I have to be on before surgery, and three I have no idea my scan result so that's always a worry waiting for the news from that. But I'm going to try and think positively as iv done through all of this and hope everything will work out!! 
Bring on round 4 my Last round of this session 😁😁