Chemo round 1 .

13/10/ is a date that I always remember it's my longest friends birthday but this year it's for a different reason I started my first round of chemo. 
I woke up feeling positive a bit nervous but walked my boy and cleared my head. Scott drove me in the van I was told by my oncologist that I could drive myself but thought best not on the first one. 
We arrived at 9.25 and off I went on my own no visitors aloud. Once I was booked in with my weight and temperature taken I was called in I had a lovely nurse who explained that I'd have to take 5 anti sickness and steroid tablets with hot water no more cold drinks now. I had my cannula fitted then was given a heat pad to wrap my arm in my chemo infusion causes something called neuropathy which causes painful pins and needle that go through my hands,feet and infusion arm the most it does also make most my body tingle too, so I have to keep them warm or hot most the time (I'm the most hottest person so I rly struggle with this). 
Once they were happy I was warm enough my infusion started it takes 2 hours so I had made sure to download some Netflix and keep myself occupied. Off  course I didn't really get to watch my downloads my phone was going crazy with all txt messages and calls from family which was greatly appreciated and made me feel like I wasn't alone. All the nurses were so kind she kept coming to check I was ok. The lovely volunteers kept coming round asking if I wanted tea, sandwiches, soups cakes ect I was too scared to eat or drink after being told that the neuropathy could cause my throat to close if it got too cold so waited too eat until I was home and they wouldn't want to keep me longer. 
Finally the 2 hours were up I still had to have 30 minutes flush whilst that was going in the pins and needles started it's such a strange feeling and the more you do what you know to do with pins and needles to move it really hurts I learnt quickly to get my hands wet and stay still. 
Finally all done and was time for the pharmacist to come round with my meds and INJECTIONS 😢💉. This part took me by surprise I burst out crying and couldn't stop which made them panic that I wouldn't be able to breath properly due to neuropathy. I was never told I would have to inject myself I was terrified I HATE needles. I was also told I had to take 19 tablets a day I never thought that would be difficult but believe me after day five that becomes a struggle. 
It was time to go home I was shaken and trying to cope with the newness of neuropathy so off I went slowly making sure to book my next appointments. I looked down and realised that my grey top I had gone in wearing was now nearly black where I had sweated so much I felt absolutely disgusting and embarrassed but I don't think one actual person even cared or noticed that's when he realised that I shouldn't  care or be bothered either about what anyone thought of me because they arnt the ones going through this.

Iv never been happier than to see Scott in his filthy petrol stinking van but I was(partly because it covered the smell of me 🤣) I was so glad to be going home. I think I was home by 1.30 camped up in the sofa being waited on hand and foot by Scott and dad followed by dean.  Matthew is currently on a reduced timetable due to him not being able to cope all day at school due to his autism he finishes everyday at 1. So nanny Vee (Scott's mum) dropped him over once I was home. He was very upset to see me laid up on the sofa and actually looking poorly he thought he was going to catch my cancer and wouldn't come anywhere near me for the rest of the night eventually everyone calmed down and the rest of the evening was calm. 
The children broke up from school that Friday and we had booked a little weekend away to camber sands to stay in a caravan with my sister and her boyfriend.I made sure to double pack lots of fluffy blankets socks and water bottles thanks to my lovely friend Lauren who had given me a lovely hamper before my chemo I had lots of extras that the children hadn't stollen yet . The kids absolutely loved it the arcades were a hit so we spent most of the time pouring pennies into them 🤦🏼‍♀️. 
It was nice to get away but myself and my sister got poorly so Scott spent most the holiday on edge incase my temperature went to high and I'd have to go to hospital.  Luckily it didn't and we spent the evenings chilling out watching films and playing games which was just what we all needed.  
Once we got home I realised that I really needed to take it easy so I listened to my body and spent a few days doing nothing.  
The dreaded day had arrived that I had to do my injection this I couldn't do no matter how I tried I couldn't get my head around stabbing myself with a needle 😳. Thankfully I have the most amazing friend Gina who came and done my injections for me I did repay with wine so she was happy.The injections are to stop my white blood cells getting low and developing neutropenia which would inevitably stop my treatment they form more blood cells that make bone marrow this also made me have the most crippling back pain that felt like contractions so lucky I had liquid morphine because it was so painful.So far so good for chemo round one, roll on number 2!!!

Before chemo number 2 it was Halloween so we had a little Halloween party and friends over for trick or treating. Which was so lovely and nice to be able to feel normal. The kids had so much fun dressing up and getting lots of sweets 🍭 

I have been very overwhelmed by how helpful and supportive all my friends and family have been since I started my chemo and would just like to thank them because it has been rough and I haven't been the most nicest person being as I can't stand to really be around too many people 🤦🏼‍♀️🤣

I would also like to thank everyone who sponsored me on my dog walks in October I raised £670 for cancer research uk 😁